..starmonots..

kisah sempit dan longgar

2010-04-06T19:43:00.000+08:00

di sini, di pintu samping.
di pojok bagian pojok.
terpojokkan.

tempat ini longgar.
terlalu longgar malah.
aku butuh pintu.
aku butuh pembatas.
ingin membuatnya sebuah sekat.

karena aku sempit.
sempit sendiri.
sendiri.
sen-di-ri.

terlalu longgar.
aku takut.
takut.
ta-kut.

takut terpojokkan lagi olehmu.
takut dipinggirkan lagi olehmu.
maaf, jika pada akhirnya hanya udara kosong yang menemaniku.
maaf.
ma-af.

karena dirimu terlalu longgar untukku.

salam hangat,
dari diri yang sempit ini.

Why do people commit suicide?

2009-12-07T08:20:00.006+08:00

picture from google.com :)

Here are the facts:

In 1996, among teenagers and young adults suicide took more lives than cancer, heart disease, AIDS, birth defects, strokes, pneumonia, the flu, and chronic lung diseases *combined*.
More people die from suicide than from homicide.
Rates of suicide increase with age and are highest for those over 65.
The most common method of commiting suicide is with a firearm.
Men are more likely to complete a suicide (and men are more likely to use firearms), but women make more attempts.
From 1980 to 1996 the rate of suicides among children 10 to 14 years of age.

All of these facts are taken from *The Surgeon General's Call to Action to Prevent Suicide*, published in 1999 by the Office of the Surgeon General of the United States (Satcher, in Ciccarelli & Meyer, 2006). Many of these facts might come as a suprise. We could see one fact the day before, 2 out of 3 people who suicide at Mall are Men.

What are the signs of impending suicide?
Ciccarelli and Meyer (2006) explain that sometimes there are none, but DEPRESSION is one of the most common mental disorders associated with suicide, and depression does have signs:

feelings of hopelessness or emptiness (95% ppl have ever feeling this)
lack of energy or fatigue (sure, especially if you have a full-time work)
anhedonia (inability to feel pressure or enjoyment)
irritability (you were get the mitten by your spouse, maybe?)
sleeping problems (too much sleep or too little)
eating more or less than usual (hmmm)
physical symptoms that persist, such as headaches, stomachaches, or pain (hey, don't take it piddling!)

People who are depressed and intend to commit suicide usually do talk about it, and this communication should always be taken seriously. There is a long-standing belief that "people who talk about it just want attention and won't really follow through," but this is not at all true. Satcher (2001) explain that talking about commiting suicide is a kind of "dress rehearsal", and people who intend to commit suicide may clear out desks and lockers, settle their finances, write out wills, and even seem in relatively good spirits because they have made the decision to "end it" and are looking forward to the escape (in Ciccarelli & Meyer, 2006).

What can be done to prevent suicide?
Here are some guidelines from the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention:

Listen with sincere attitude of concern
Avoid giving unasked-for advice
Ask them if they experienced feeling like this before and how they managed to cope with it then
Share a time when you felt the same way and assure them that things can and will change
Ask them if they are feeling suicidal
Stay with them; do something together
If you have immediate concern, call the police for emergency intervention
Give them the number for the suicide prevention hot line and make sure they call

Above all, a person who tries to prevent a suicide and fails should not feel responsible. In the end, if a person committed to the act of suicide succeeds, there was nothing that any bystander could really do to prevent it.

reference: Ciccarelli, S. K., Meyer, G. E. 2006. Psychology. New Jersey: Pearson Education, Inc.

being 19's as odd as being 11

2009-11-25T17:40:00.009+08:00

from: picturebookillustration.blogspot.com

well, it's my birthday, but not my birth date.
just my-birth's-day :D
wednesday, that is.

am 19 now, but sometimes, I feel like an 11.

why I said same?
a. both are the prime numbers.
b. both are the transition ages.
c. both are the odd numbers *it'll make everyone in that ages are odds, I guess* :D
d. a,b,c are true.

if you pick;
a. yap. that's true. just see them. 11-13-17-19 *even the pupils know that* LOL
b. yap. because when (1) I was 11, you could say I was a kid/child, but some says, I've already tween/adolescents. and (2) now I'm 19, you could say I'm in my late adolescents age, or in my young adults age :D
c. yap. odds! LOL as I told u above, when you were in 11, you're in the adolescents' transition. it makes you seems like a-girl-from-outer-space. you don't know how to enter your 'periodstarts' age, and something called puberty. and when you are in 19, you're in adolescents-to-young-adults' transition. and it makes you seems like a-woman-wannabe-from-very-outer-space. you have to leave all the girl's thing that you love, and starts to think what's woman thinks, and do what's woman does.
d. yeah, a, b, c are true :)

that's all the reason why I said that being 19 is as odd as being 11 :D

what do you think? ;)

Half in Love, Red.

2009-11-22T19:03:00.007+08:00

I have read a book Half In Love, written by Maile Meloy which has a good story about Red that I loved. A soldier named Red meet a girl named Irene. Red likes her, but seems Irene doesn't reply his compliment.

Overcome, he caught the girl's hand in his, but it was so lifeless and passive it made him angry. He crushed it in his grip, sliding the bones and sinews inward toward the palm, the slender fingers crossing one over the other. "Don't," the girl said. She pulled her hand from his but kept walking by his side, eyes straight ahead.
"You're like death," Red said. "There's no life in you. What's the point of being beautiful?" She stopped, and looked ready to answer, but shook her head and began to walk again. He caught her then, and kissed her hard. Her hair smelled like lilacs but her skin smelled like nothing; there was no close body scent to distinguish her from the cold night air.

then Irene offers sex to him but he rejects her. LOL *that's one of the part which I like* :D

She said, without looking at him, "You're passionate, I guess."

"You can stay with me if you like," she said.

"You mean I can share your bed?" he said.
"Yes," she said. "If you like."

"Well, I don't," he said finally. "I don't like."

*does he really not want it?*
I guess not.
Like Freud told us, what's on a man's mind is sex. sex. sex. LOL

then?
yep. like I guessed before, they get laid.
LOL

"I'm going to France in the morning," he said, after a while. It suprised him to think she didn't already know.
She looked over at him. She was close enough to kiss if he sat up a little, but he didn't want that. he just wanted her lying there. Her eyes were solemn.
"It's going to be worse than you know," she said.
Red looked back up at the sky. A mist had drifted in, obscuring the stars, which had moved some distance along their course, and soon the waiting would be over. After a while the girl moved her hand from behind her head and took Red's in hers, and they lay on the chill stone like an old couple in an old bed, fingers intertwined, until the sky began lo lighten, and it was time for Red to go.

LOL

even it's in the fantasy life, we could still approve the Freud's theory that is What's on a Man's Mind is Sex.

do you agree, guys? ;)

satellite heart

2009-11-02T18:18:00.002+08:00

yep. like anya marina's song.
but in my verse :D

i feel lost.
maybe.
but no assurance.

call me selfish.
call me lunatic.
yes, you could.
it doesn't matter.
it's okee.

why lost?

don't ask me.
'cuz i don't have the answer.
as i said before.
no assurance.

what am i talking about?

well,
maybe everything.
maybe anything.
it could be about sun.
or it could be about darkness.

hahaha

Crisis

2009-09-02T12:45:00.001+08:00

july - august - september
that months would be the holy-months.
why holy?
holiday[s]?
well, maybe holey[s] too.

people pay to be paid,
people paid to pay.
maybe that could be normal, but unfortunately it becomes abnormal,
when people do hard for this, do hard for that,
and what people get is incommensurate to they did.
it's ironic, I think.
really makes us terribly concerned.

why?
incomes not balance with outcomes?!.
yeah, you're right.
outcomes are bigger now.
holy-shit! shit! shit!

...

do you feel it too?
do you curious about it too?

I feel it.

it named CRISIS.
what kind of crisis?
well, it could be anything.
crisis of economy, crisis of energy, crisis of morality, even crisis of ideas.
what do you think?

...

so,
what can we do?
what can we do to make it back normal?
crying?
life is too short to be a crybaby.
trying?
I even trying everything to do this, to do that
[in order that] I can get this, can get that.
[but] maybe it still nothing.
hoping? wishing?
I don't like hoping.
[but] I always wishing something good.
[and] it always happened, nevertheless it comes late.
like a green day's song, I wish someone to wake me up when september ends. LOL

it seems like everything in disorder.

whoaaaaa!

this is an unexpected condition in an expected situation.

let's making ourselves sure that the storm will passed soon.
amin.

:((

2009-08-18T14:27:00.000+08:00

cepet sembuh yaaang :'(

homesick

2009-08-18T12:34:00.003+08:00

I lose some sales
and my boss won't be happy
but I can't stop listening to the sound
of two soft voices blended in perfection
from the reels of this record that I found

every day there's a boy in the mirror
asking me
what are you doing here
finding all my previous motives
growing increasingly unclear

I travelled far and I burned all the bridges
I believed as SOON as I hit land
all the other
options held before me
WILL wither in the light of my plan

so I lose some sales
and my boss won't be happy
but there's only one thing on my mind
searching boxes underneath the counter
on a chance that on a tape I'd find

a song for
someone who needs somewhere
to long for

homesick
cause I no longer know
what home is

-Kings of Convenience - Homesick

huhuhu
I love this song.
when I heard it, I always wondering where I should be.
yeah.
Where am I?
Where should I be?

I always feel empty.
null.

really homesick.
missed something called home.
but I don't know where actually my H-O-M-E is.

sick.
home.
sick.
homesick.

someone out there, could you find me a way to home?

Having Foreplay with Hot Chocolate

2009-06-24T17:21:00.001+08:00

di pojok pintu samping,
aku senang duduk disitu.
di dekat pilar persegi panjang depan jendela.

senang rasanya melihat para penghuni jalanan meneriakkan klaksonnya.
senang rasanya mendengar lagu tak jelas yang mengiang di kupingku.
benci sih, melihat para penghuni jalanan itu selalu bergantian berteriak.
benci sih, mendengar suara tak jelas yang selalu bergantian mendengung.

ahh..
nikmat rasanya..
menikmati cokelatnya hidup.
menikmati cokelatnya saringan nikotin.
menikmati cokelatnya cairan di gelas itu.

hot chocolate
aku suka hot chocolate
selalu suka dia
karena dia selalu tahu caranya membuat jalanan lurus di otak saya menjadi keriting.
kenapa harus keriting?
ya, karena otak keriting itulah otak normal.

yeah,
otak keriting saya bisa menjadikan saya normal dalam berpikir tentang tugas-tugas itu.

5.19pm - @pintu samping

Fresh Unfresh

2009-06-15T13:14:00.001+08:00

hmmm..

i have the fresh health but i don't have the fresh body
i have the fresh mind but i don't have the fresh brain

isn't it moronic?

you have the fresh words but you don't have the fresh mouth
you have the fresh hearing but you don't have the fresh ears

isn't it moronic?

she has the fresh look but she doesn't have the fresh face
she has the fresh cookery but she doesn't have the fresh hands

isn't it moronic?

he has the fresh power but he doesn't have the fresh muscles
he has the fresh precise but he doesn't have the fresh eyes

isn't it moronic?

we don't have the fresh air in this superannuated-world
we don't have the fresh idea in this one's-own-world

huft..

i think it's really-super-moronic things that i ever 'speak'

08.09am,in.this.fucking-world

The Expressive Baby

2009-06-09T14:57:00.006+08:00

two days after my 19th birthday, my nephew was born. it happened on march 2009 :)
i love the baby because i saw him birth :D

here are his photos :)

look at his right hand :) it was taken on 10th April 2009 :)
*click here to shall look in more detail*

the baby eat richeese :D
*click here to shall look in more detail*

he's so cute. isn't he? :D
*click here to shall look in more detail*

if you don't mind, please left a comment :)

Omelette

2009-06-08T10:41:00.004+08:00

hoahmm...
i was still sleepy when my mom waking me up.

huft..
it's monday and it's clinical class :(

i wish i could turn back time to april.
yeah, april.
i disgrasp when i remember this month is june, and it means i have to do my experiment design. sigh*

hmmm...
in this morning, i guess i want omelette..
hihihi
i found that picture in my gallery.
it was taken on February 2nd, 2009.
do you believe that i made it?
if not, you can ask rendy :P

it's easy to make omelette :)
you must have two eggs, cheese *gratin*, and margarine :)
whisk the eggs 'till it soft like foam, then pre-heat your griddle and spread margarine *you can use butter, if you have it* on it.
pour the eggs-which-you-had-whisk on the griddle, and spread the gratin on it.
hmmmm.. it smells good :D
wait 'till the color's brownyellow :D
take your plate, and tada!
it's ready to eat it! :)

Wafelatos! lezatos

2009-06-07T11:32:00.003+08:00

it's SUNday. huft..

people loves that day. but unfortunately i'm not.
'cause it remains me about my e********t reports and stay to the counter.
:( :( :(

but...
dunno why, in that morning, i want to eat tinned sardines.
so i went to the nearest-small-shop from my house.

at there,
i bought the tinned sardines, energen jahe, and wafelatos itself.
i ever eat wafelatos before *maybe three days ago* :D
the taste sooo PERFECTo chocolate!!!

yeah, and i RECOMMEND youuuu! to taste the overflowing-chocolate-of-wafelatos.
the combination of the cream and the rice crispy on it will satisfies your mouth.
TRUST ME!

ps: the price only IDR 1,000 ;)

It's Coto!

2009-06-03T07:46:00.007+08:00

hmmm..

yesterday was tuesday, and i was busy enough for that day.
it's a very HOT day! *and i think that in everywhere people feel the same too*

well,
i'll tell you something about one of my favorite food for lunch now. :D

yeah!
the picture that seen above is COTO.

hmm..
it contains meat, peanut and spices!
SLURP!!
*did i waken your appetite?* :P
LOL

my favorite places to eat coto are COTO DEWI 5 (on Toddopuli, near with PLN), COTO DAENG (on Pengayoman, behind MP) and COTO PARAIKATTE (on Pettarani, beside new-gas-station-which-built).

mmm,
when you order a portion, you'll given lime, fried onion and green onion.
you have to 'personalized' the coto as like you want. *it's one of the 'fun' part* :D

mmm,
you can choose about a plate of rice or ketupat.
and i suggest you to eat coto with ketupat.
why?
ugh..
i guess you better eat it first and having experience of it by yourself! :P
LOL

ps: i'm not responsible to all of you who want to eat coto after read this post! LOL

Energen!

2009-06-01T07:32:00.011+08:00

hmmm..
today is monday..

well..
as usual, in every morning, i never have breakfast..
but after i bought an energen jahe from the nearest store, i LOVE to drink it in every morning as my breakfast! LOL

yeah,
it's different from another cereals because it contains jahe (red ginger) which can make you sweaty much! LOL

hmm..
anyone?

Google Wave

2009-05-31T13:43:00.009+08:00

this picture form google.com

this hot SUNday,
i checked out of all my accounts on all listed-sites-i-sign-to.
yeah, maybe for friend updates, messages, requests, etc.

after checked some of the sites, then i 'landed' on my Twitter.
on there, i was looking for trending topics list and i saw Google Wave.
i find out it by googling then. :P

and i 'landed' on this.

...

tuing?? -_-a

well..
i can't talk too much, but my 'while' conclusion is that Google Wave looks like Facebook + Gmail :D

hmm..
let's wait 'till its 'come'..

nightmare before christmas :D

2009-05-30T21:38:00.010+08:00

this picture from google.com

today, i went to MTC karebosi makassar.
i wanted to looking for a pc headset :D

at there, i came up to an accesories mobile phone store firstly :-D
unfortunately i can't find it *hell yeah, i came to wrong store* :-P

but wait...

i saw something!
what was that??

KYAAAAAAAA!!

i saw a NIGHTMARE BEFORE XMAS' casing for my mobile phone!!
and it's Glow in The Dark!!!

oh..
Lucky Me!!
i've been searching that for long time ago :P

oh..
how LOVEly this day!! :)
how about urs? :D

addicted to injection

2009-05-30T14:41:00.007+08:00

28th May, 2009.
i've got my first time to blood donor. of course i was the donor :)
before that time, i've tried three times to give my blood but i didn't qualified because my weight was not enough yet :D

so i was trying on that time, when my faculty celebrate it's 9th birthday :)
and guess what??
i PASSED!!!!! :))

huft..
i was HAPPY but my heart was beating like a hammer! LOL
my friend said that the feeling when the hypodermic needle touch the skin was soooo hurt!
ooopss..
my heart keep beating more than like a hammer! :D

and then...
here we go!!
it's my turn!

so i came up to that room where two beds and a nurse were there.

....

it's really my turn!!

the nurse tell me to be in bed and she measured my blood pressure first.
i asked, "is it hurt?"
and she just smile at me! sigh*

....

and then she started to put the hypodermic needle into my skin softly...
i feel NOTHING!
my friend lied to me!

LOL LOL LOL

it's finish!
hah?
i shocked that my out-blood is 250cc :D

but, wait..

i feel something..

i guess i WANTed it more!!
i WANT more!!

ouch...
please give me the needle..

seekor manusia yang mencoba menikmati hidup sedang mengeluh

2009-05-25T01:18:00.007+08:00

huh..

walaupun sudah malam, tetap saja terasa padat..
entah karena tugas *laporan* yang menumpuk minta dikerjakan, atau karena mata belum terpuaskan ditutup?

huh..

kepala ini penat..
ingin pecah rasanya..
tapi kalau pecah, nanti pakai apa?

huh..

sekarang atau tunda, yang pastinya prioritas tetap pada tujuan hidup.
tujuan hidup saat ini adalah menikmati hidup.

menikmati hidup?
iya, menikmati hidup.
dengan cara membiarkan segala sesuatu terjadi dengan semestinya tanpa ada rasa menyesal.

hmmm..
yah.. berarti saya masih kurang bisa menikmati hidup dong..
yah.. sepertinya..

hmmm..
namanya juga manusia.
kamu manusia bukan?

the bird and the bee - how deep is your love

2009-03-07T15:21:00.002+08:00

click here to hear the bird and the bee how deep is your love

the bird and the bee - don't stop the music (rihanna cover)

2009-03-07T15:02:00.002+08:00

click here to hear the bird and the bee - don't stop the music (rihanna cover)

the bird and the bee - love letter to japan

2009-03-07T14:42:00.003+08:00

From the west to the east I have flown to be near you
I have come all this way to be close, to be here with you
And now, all my heart I will lay down precisely at your feet

My beloved, oh my sweet
All the gifts you have given me
The patience and the peace,
Cherry blossoms and the candy,
I am yours, I am yours
For as long, for as long as you will have me

Dearest one, I had a dream
I mouthed the words,
The sound came out,
I spoke to you in Japanese
Oh, my love I cannot see, I heard your name
I know at once there was no place I'd rather be
All at once there was no place that I would rather be

From the west to the east I have flown to be near you
I have come all this way to be close, to be here with you
And now, all my heart I will lay down precisely at your feet

My beloved, oh my sweet
All the gifts you have given me
The patience and the peace,
Cherry blossoms and the candy,
I am yours, I am yours
For as long, for as long as you will have me

I packed my bag, I'm on my way
I am prepared for any season
I am prepared to stay
Here is my heart, my beating heart
Oh, how I'm longing for this love affair to start
How I'm longing for this love affair to finally start

From the west to the east I have flown to be near you
I have come all this way to be close, to be here with you
And now, all my heart I will lay down precisely at your feet

My beloved, oh my sweet
All the gifts you have given me
The patience and the peace,
Cherry blossoms and the candy,
I am yours, I am yours
For as long, for as long as you will have me

[... Japanese ...]

From the west to the east I have flown to be near you
I have come all this way to be close, to be here with you
And now, all my heart I will lay down precisely at your feet

My beloved, oh my sweet
All the gifts you have given me
The patience and the peace,
Cherry blossoms and the candy,
I am yours, I am yours
For as long, for as long as you will have me

gak usah dibaca,, gak penting

2009-03-05T08:09:00.002+08:00

hari ini gak telattt!! yippie!!

hehehe

patut dicatat :)

udah dibilang,, gak usah dibaca.. gak penting, kan? ;)

hehehe ^^v

2009-02-26T12:49:00.001+08:00

let me updating my blog :)

i like quiz.
this was tagged by issa samichat on facebook :)

and this is the result:

Your view on yourself:
You are down-to-earth and people like you because you are so straightforward. You are an efficient problem solver because you will listen to both sides of an argument before making a decision that usually appeals to both parties.

The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking for:
You are not looking merely for a girl/boyfriend - you are looking for your life partner. Perhaps you should be more open-minded about who you spend time with. The person you are looking for might hide their charm under their exterior.

Your readiness to commit to a relationship:
You are ready to commit as soon as you meet the right person. And you believe you will pretty much know as soon as you might that person.

The seriousness of your love:
You are very serious about relationships and aren't interested in wasting time with people you don't really like. If you meet the right person, you will fall deeply and beautifully in love.

Your views on education:
Education is less important than the real world out there, away from the classroom. Deep inside you want to start working, earning money and living on your own.

The right job for you:
You're a practical person and will choose a secure job with a steady income. Knowing what you like to do is important. Find a regular job doing just that and you'll be set for life.

How do you view success:
Success in your career is not the most important thing in life. You are content with what you have and think that being with someone you love is more than spending all of your precious time just working.

What are you most afraid of:
You are concerned about your image and the way others see you. This means that you try very hard to be accepted by other people. It's time for you to believe in who you are, not what you wear.

Who is your true self:
You are mature, reasonable, honest and give good advice. People ask for your comments on all sorts of different issues. Sometimes you might find yourself in a dilemma when trapped with a problem, which your heart rather than your head needs to solve.

well,, click here to get the quiz :)

have a nice day all :)

Technophobia

2009-02-12T15:10:00.001+08:00

well, today i went to my faculty's library :D. at there, i get shocked when i see a book with a title: Technophobia "The Psychological impact of information technology" by Mark Brosnan. Why??? Cuz I always thought that every people needs technology, but how come a-part-of-them could have phobia on that???

hmmm... so I read that and found these:

What is Technophobia?

1. a resistance to talking about computers or even thinking about computers.
2. fear or anxiety towards computers.
3. hostile or aggressive thoughts about computers.

(Jay, 1981:47)

Does it exist?
Computer anxiety is a real phenomenon.

(Moldafsky and Kwon, 1994:301)

Who has it?
One third of the entire population of the industrial world!

(Brosnan and Davidson, 1994)

*What The ..????!!!*

Both anxiety and (negative) attitudes have been identified as factors contributing to a sense of technophobia. Sex differences have been identified - females have been found to possess more computer anxiety than males, and more negative attitudes. These findings have not been consistent, with some research indicating no sex differences. Recent research has implied that it is psychological gender, rather than biological sex, that relates to technophobia.

Well. it could be reducted with a programme, that is called technophobia reduction programme. The people who has the phobia, have to touch the computer with brave firstly :) and bla bla bla until the people type and doing something with the computer *include destroy 'em??* :P

but we have Question that is "Could this be the way forward??". The answer is YES. If you believe the technophobia reduction programme will work! And if not, just read on.. and wait the time to be ready ;)

hmmm... but i guessed that it's just only happened on long time ago, cuz for the future, no one feels anxiety with computers.. cuz everyday,everytime,everyminute people will face 'em. :D

well. i think that's all. gotta go home.. (bye) :)

It (the digital revolution) offers the priceless intangible of friendship, community and understanding.

-Wired, 1996:43-

source: Brosnan, Mark J., Technophobia: The Psychological Impact of Information Technology. 1998. London: Routledge

-d corner of libraryBM,classBM-

it's called Lovingitis

2009-01-29T17:21:00.001+08:00

iya..
ini memang tentang cinta..
ini juga tentang penyakit..
sebut saja penyakit cinta..
kerennya, LOVINGITIS :)

penyebab:

menemukan orang/sesuatu yang disayangi
menyayangi orang/sesuatu itu bahkan melebihi rasa sayang pada dirinya sendiri

gejala:

demam cinta, bisa jadi malarindu
nafsu makan tak stabil selama belum melihatnya
asma *sesak napas* saat mendengar suaranya/melihat matanya
insomnia bila tak mendengar suaranya/melihatnya
jantung berdebar-debar saat di dekatnya/mendengar suaranya
sariawan, karena kurang vitamin C(inta)
sakit kepala, bila tidak mendengar kabarnya

ps: gejala diatas hanya gejala umum, gejala dapat berbeda pada setiap orang

pertolongan pertama dan penanggulangannya:

meneleponnya/mengirim sms kepadanya
melihat fotonya
melihat sms-smsnya
mendengar pesan audionya
pergi ke tempat kalian pernah datangi/pertama kali bertemu
memasak masakan yang kalian pernah masak bersama *jika pernah*
berbicara dengan teman dekatnya
curhat denganNya *Dia Maha Tahu*
jika sudah sangat akut, tidak ada jalan lain selain menemuinya :D

jika kalian yang sedang mengalaminya, tiada hal yang diperlukan selain SABAR :)
sesungguhnya orang-orang yang bersabar, akan selalu diberikan hadiah olehNya.

missedhimode:ON-suatusoresetelahujan

menghabiskan sisa waktu

2009-01-13T16:03:00.001+08:00

gimana?

ya gitu.

denganmu, waktu terasa lambat.

tanpamu, waktu harus terasa sangat cepat.

aku kangen kamu, tau!

selalu!

huh.

ya kalo gada kamu, aku harus melakukan sibuksibuksibuk supaya jikalau kamu di sampingku, aku tak sibuk lagi.

bukan kamu yang menemaniku, akulah yang menemanimu.

hmmmm

2009-01-04T19:41:00.001+08:00

aku sayang kamu
titik

hmmm...
rasa yang gila.
gila. aneh.
bisa aja.
karena aku sayang kamu
itu aja.
ga tau kenapa.
jangan tanya kenapa.
aku merasa.
bukan yang membuat.

aku sayang kamu
titik

@grusycafe - withim - 0800pm

hilang sepi punah

2008-12-10T16:13:00.001+08:00

hmmm...

ini apa lagi, entahlah...

saya juga ga tau..

*aneh*

aneh???

biarkan saja..

mau mengingat saja..
kemarin dulu lebaran,
tapi tak seperti lebaran biasanya..

sepi!

iyaa...
sepi...
entah kemana semua orangorang..
hanya suara yang menemaniku..
suara siapa?
tanya ayam!

kok bisaa??

iyaaaa....
bisa saja...

orangorang sok sibukkk...
orangorang sok warawiri...

entah apa mereka ingat mereka..
sesama makhlukNya..
ataukah,
daging yang bergenerasi seperti mereka itu disimpan saja dalam lemari-listrik-dingin mereka??

huh!

saya tauuuu...
itu bukan urusan saya...
memang...
itu urusan mereka...
saya sebagai mereka hanya mengingatkan kepada mereka.. :)

lusanyalebaran - sekedarunutwaktu mode: ON

kacaukanku, kaca.

2008-12-03T15:42:00.001+08:00

entahlah...

kamu jujur di depan.
tapi racun di belakang.

kamu memberitahuku semua yang aku tak lihat.
iya..

aku selalu jalan ke depan..
jarang ngeliat ke belakang..
*males deh, sejarah*

kamu ngasih tau ke aku, semuasemuashithings di belakangku.
makasih.

tapi tau gak?

hari ini, sumpah-demi-sumpah! aku BENCI ma kamu!!!
gimana gak!
kamu selalu nyoba nusuk aku pake sudutmu yang paling tajam!!
OMG!

arrgh!!
sakit tau!
anjing!

hari ini, sumpah-demi-sumpah! aku BENCI ma kamu!!! *lagi*
gimana gak!
kamu (dulu) janji. apapun yang aku simpan di kamu, kamu jaga.
nyatanya apaaa???
kenapa mama tirinya snow white bisa tau??

kurap!!
iblis!
arrgh!!!!!

hari ini, sumpah-demi-sumpah! aku superBENCI ma kamu!!! *lagi dan lagii*
kenapa????!!!
nanya lagi!

kamu PECAH!!!!

itu salah kamu!
itu salah kamu!!
itu salah kamu....!!!!!!!!

jangan bawa-bawa aku!!!
kamu sudah pecah berserakan!
menyisakan sampah!

hahaha
gantian, ya?
kali ini, aku yang nyimpan sampah kamu!
tapi sayang, sampah kamu abadi..
aku males nyimpan.
gimana kalo aku buang juga?
sekalian.

soalnya kamu RACUN!!
gimana gak..
kamu itu ada raksanya!
gak bisa nyatu ma darahku!
ntar aku jadi mutan, lagi!
gak mau!
aku gak mau jadi mutan!
cukup!
aku tak akan jadi mutan lagi!
ini sudah bentuk terbaik dari transformasiku!
jangan kacaukan aku, plisss!!!

kalo kamu mau kacaukan aku,
tunggu aba-aba dariku.

supaya kamu puas.
aku pun puas.

hmm...
tunggu.
1
dua
three!

*eeeerrrrrooooooorrrrrrrrrr*

puas?
gak?
gak masalah..
kamu emang gak pernah ada.
jadi ini hanya terjadi di otakotorku.

hahaha
ngarep ini terjadi?
sejauh mana pikiran kamu bisa main?
itu yang terjadi..
jadi?
jadi.. silahkan saja membayangkannya!

otakotoracunih mode: ON

hujan?

2008-11-27T17:28:00.001+08:00

iya..
sekarang lagi hujan..
ntah nanti..

hujan hilang diharap..
hujan datang hina..

heran.
heran.
heran.

yahh..

dasar manusia.
tak pernah puas, tak pernah memuaskan, tak pernah dipuaskan.
dasar manusia.

apaaa??!

kamu tersinggung??!

hahaha

jadi kenapa?

dasar!

baru saja aku bilang manusia, kalian sudah merasa.

ngaca dong!

apakah manusia namanya, korupsi dimana-mana?!
apakah manusia namanya, membantah orang tua?!
apakah manusia namanya, membuat tanah menangis?!
apakah manusia namanya, tak pernah ikhlas dan syukur?!

hujan lebih baik darimu, manusia!
dia selalu ikhlas mengerjakan tugasnya, walau dia enggan melihat tanah kalian sudah rapuh dan becek!
hujan lebih baik darimu, manusia!
dia selalu bersyukur melihat kalian saling bertanya kabar setelah ia mengerjakan tugasnya dengan ikhlas!

masih tidak tahu diri?

terserahmu sajalah..

aku juga manusia.

sudut mati, hari ini hujan mode: ON

A B K (part. 1)

2008-11-25T21:45:00.001+08:00

A B K ?

hmmmm.....

bisa ditebaakk.. ini bukan tentang Anak Buah Kapal.. ato *** lain.. :P

ini tentang Anak Berkebutuhan Khusus...

hahahaha.

memang...
ini tentang dunia abnormal...

sekedar info, dulu namanya Anak Luar Biasa..
cuma, lebih dinormalkan menjadi Anak Berkebutuhan Khusus..

hari ini, saya mulai *melihat-lihat* tingkah laku (dkk) tentang mereka..
terutama Tuna Grahita..

Bagi yang amnesia, tuna grahita itu mirip autis..
hanya saja, beda.

hahaha..

bedanya apa, saya juga masih meng'kaji'nya..
hahaha...

banyak hal-hal baru yang saya ketahui tentang mereka, ABK umumnya..
mulai dari cara mereka bersosialisasi, berpikir, memandang hidup...
semuanya UNIK.

kasihan teman saya....
kenapa???
karena mereka mendapat *bagian* tuna rungu, tuna netra...
mereka harus berusaha-bagaimana-mereka-lancar-berkomunikasi untuk mengetahui kebiasaan dan kebisaan dari para ABK (selain tuna grahita)...
hehehe....

satu hal lagi, mengutip senior saya, "Jika anda mencari *muka* saja, di SLB banyaaakkkk..!!"

hwakakakakakkakakakkakakkk

hal ini, fakta! ^^v

untuk dokumentasi, nantilah saya aplot di fesbukkk *kartika monoarfa*...
ini lagi laloddd..
dan saya sedang membutuhkan energi ekstra untuk besokkkk....

so?
so? buhbyeee...

**tunggu ABK selanjutnyaaa**

^^v

new?

2008-11-24T20:59:00.001+08:00

entahlah..

hmmm....

mungkin hasil dari bentukan endapan gejala stress, akhirnya saya membuat blog *akun* baru..

postingan lama bisa dilihat disini.

hmmmm...

saya tahu, itu sudah basi dari yang terbasi..
tapi, apa salahnya jika saya ber-narsis ria dengan mempostingnya lagi?

adakah yang protes?
silahkan..
tak ada yang melarang..
selagi anda saya ijinkan untuk memprotesnya..

:)